


error 323 (could this be love)

by writesinfontuwu



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Accidents, Airplane Crashes, Alternate Universe - Artificial Intelligence, Alternate Universe - Robots & Androids, Angst and Tragedy, Character Death, Donghyuck dies in a plane crash, Heavy Angst, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, KunWin if you squint hard enough, M/M, NoMin is pretty obvious but well if you want to squint, One-Sided Attraction, RenHyuck are disgustingly in love and engaged, Renjun dies in a suicide, Unrequited Love, Wakes & Funerals, Yangyang is in love with Renjun, Yangyang is the android with AI, one-sided RenYang
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-12 20:15:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29016447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writesinfontuwu/pseuds/writesinfontuwu
Summary: Section 234, Article N, page 58, paragraph 10, line number 7.Do not develop emotions for your human.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Donghyuck | Haechan, Huang Ren Jun/Liu Yang Yang
Comments: 16
Kudos: 36





	error 323 (could this be love)

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, I’m bringing forth major angst and MCD tags. So, please please please, I’m begging you to read the tags. All trigger warnings and other things to note are in the tags. Please heed it carefully, your safety is important and priority.
> 
> This work is set to Mature solely because it is really heavy in angst and also mentions of Suicide. Nothing implicitly sexual or anything but the "Implied Sexual Content" is there because there are mentions of it but nothing graphic. Please read the tags, it's really important. I don't want to trigger anyone but this fic is pretty emotional and dark. Consider yourself warned.
> 
> With that being said, enjoy :) Leave me comments if you liked this! Also, shoutout to my two Beta-readers for beta-reading this, you two are brave peeps who have to deal with this emotional mess.

Yangyang woke up to a whirl of mechanics and Kun’s soft voice speaking to another person he couldn’t quite make out. He heard low murmurs of conversation that he couldn’t quite understand — “listen, we need new parts,” a low wail and someone replied, “we might have to change his motherboard”. He groaned from where he was linked up, successfully alerting both Kun and the other guy. It’s Sicheng’s face that Yangyang sees first as he groans and there was a soothing, warm hand on his head. He hummed lightly as his system tried to gather more information about his whereabouts.

“You’re back with us, Yangyang. It’ll be okay again,” Kun gently soothed, placing a comforting hand on his knees.

Yangyang frowned at his words, shaking his head lightly, feeling the spare parts in his brain rattling into their respective slots. The internal system hummed lightly as Yangyang recalibrated his memory space as a blurred memory of a smiling boy replays in his mind. He heard Kun’s exasperated sigh at his actions and Sicheng low murmuring but Yangyang couldn’t care less. He knew that the person was important, he swore he was, but there was an error file at where his name and occupation should be. Yangyang frowned and before he could even be stopped, he saw black and the loud frustrated groan from Kun.

 _Good morning, Yangyang_.

Yangyang gasped at the sound of the melodious voice in his head. If he could cry, if producing tears was a function he could have, he would have wept. Instead, filthy, greasy oil leaked from his eyes, startling Kun and Sicheng who quickly called for a janitor to clean up the mess. Yangyang sobbed into his legs, spraying blackened oil and grease all over the workshop bench. Kun sighed exasperatedly at the mess he had created and Sicheng gave him a light pat on his back.

“Yangyang, we need you to calm down,” Kun called out gently, dodging another wild spray of grease.

Yangyang hiccuped on the workshop bench and turned his glassy blue eyes on Kun, stiffening his cries as he sat forlornly on the workshop bench. Sicheng rested a comforting arm across his shoulders as he took a cloth and wiped the grease and oil off his face. Kun ignored the fact that the examination table was soaked in oil and grease, just sat deftly on the edge, as he held open an arm for Yangyang to dive in.

“Why can’t I remember?” Yangyang sobbed and Kun gave Sicheng a quick nod of his head.

Sicheng headed over to the door and muttered a low “sorry” to the CCTV before he power tripped it and the laboratory snapped into pitch black. Yangyang jumped at the sudden darkness and Kun gently ran a finger in his cold skin, murmuring softly at the young boy. Yangyang calmed down as Sicheng rejoined them on the table and traced a comforting finger down Yangyang’s spine. Yangyang whimpered as his brain flickered random images of a blurred figure.

The figure was smiling.

The figure was laughing.

The figure was kissing another figure.

Yangyang spluttered on his own fuel, oil welling up in his eyes, as he choked in Kun’s arms. He couldn’t remember, he couldn’t reimagine the figure’s face. He has to. He needed to. He must remember. He rubbed his hands, no _clawed_ his fingernails on his eyes, as he leapt off the table, tearing himself away from Kun. He crashed into the wall and aimed for the sharp edge of the door to the storage, smashing his head into it with quick successions. He heard the panicked yells from Kun and Sicheng as they groped blindly in the dark, following the sparks that floundered out of him as he damaged the protective layer around his head, ramming close to his motherboard with his smashes.

_Remember._

_Remember him, come on now._

He felt the synthetic skin that covered him get sliced open by the sharp edge and give a low mechanical hum. With the skin out of the way, it made it easier to dent or scratch the metallic plates hidden under the skin. He gave a low groan of pain, hands scrambling against the wall as he slid down to the floor, his head thundering as spark flew from the dented metal. The last thing Yangyang heard was Kun’s frantic yells of his name and Sicheng’s painful winces as the sparks landed on his bare hands. His vision faded to black.

———————

The first thing Yangyang saw when he was fully charged and awakened was a beautiful pair of brown eyes. The owner of the eyes was petite and adorable, and had the prettiest smiles on his face as he cheered at the operating android before him. But Yangyang knew he had purchased him and knew that his new master was this pretty adult standing before him with the sweetest smiles on his face. His synchronised, well computerised, heartbeat thundered in his chest as he drew up the file from his database for the information about the adult.

_Huang Renjun, 24 years old. Editor for one of the fashion magazines. He loves cats and had a boyfriend of seven years and they were getting married in August. His boyfriend, ah no, fiance is called Lee Donghyuck, a pilot flying with the National Carrier, Neo Airlines._

Yangyang carefully sorted the information into a drawer in his mind as Renjun beamed expectantly at him. A handsome man walked into his view and Yangyang’s system reminded that it was Donghyuck and quickly updated the file with a photo. Donghyuck was sunny and bright as he captured Renjun in a soft kiss. Renjun smiled against his lips, his eyes grew tender as he brushed a stray hair away from his face. Yangyang watched Renjun peck Donghyuck lightly on his jaw and walked him to the door. They exchanged another kiss and Renjun murmured in his ears as Donghyuck held him close for a hug.

The door closed quietly and Renjun skipped his way back, eyes gleaming in the sunlight as he circled Yangyang carefully. Renjun hummed as he made his way across the room, before turning towards Yangyang who was standing frozen, and waved him over. He slowly made his way around the two storey house, showing Yangyang the different rooms and their usage as he made his way up to where the bedrooms are located. The android trailed behind him mutely, taking in the bubbly young man who was happily telling him about their shared home. Before Yangyang could utter a single word in response, his system flared red and a warning sign flashed before his eyes.

It was a simple code from the little handy manual, one of the few in fact, that was drilled — ah, no it was _downloaded_ into his system. Yangyang blinked at the flashing red lights and raised his hand to swat at the display. He knew of the protocol, he understood the rules of being an android, and he was rendered confused as to why the display was flagging him as a Section 234. He blinked again at the flashing light and schooled himself into a neutral expression. Renjun had not noticed the lapse in response from Yangyang as evident in his continuous rambling about the house.

**Section 234, Article N, page 58, paragraph 10, line number 7.**

_Do not develop emotions for your human._

The system that Kun and Sicheng had developed was impeccable of course, and had long picked up the bubbling fuel of feelings within Yangyang. Maybe he had known of the feeling but refused to acknowledge them, maybe he didn’t want to acknowledge them, maybe he was afraid to acknowledge them. Who knows but Yangyang himself. Perhaps the system had recognised the early signs of a potential Section 234, but Yangyang refused to let it come true.

Renjun had come to a halt before a pretty dark blue door with a door plate that read “Yangyang’s Room” and turned to smile at Yangyang. “You’ll be staying in this room, I have furnished it as much as I can, but if you find anything lacking, please let me know so I can buy them for you immediately!” Renjun hummed a little as he pushed open the door and gestured for Yangyang to take a step in. “I have absolutely no idea what you consume as food, but the box did come with a couple bottles of fuel, which are in the kitchen cupboard labelled as Yangyang’s food. So help yourself to it, and the glasses are all free for you to use.”

Yangyang blinked and mechanically thanked him as he gave the room a quick glance. It must have been the right response because Renjun brightened up at his thanks and left him alone with a soft “yell, if you need me” as he retreated out of the room. He could hear him whistling as he returned to the living room and the sitcom he was watching before. Yangyang flopped on the bed, feeling his body get used to the softness under his synthetic skin, and sighed.

_Huang Renjun, oh Huang Renjun, just who are you to me?_

———————

It took Renjun exactly a week to figure out how to override the usual starting up system. Yangyang only knew you could do that after he had happily, and promptly, recorded himself saying “Good morning, Yangyang!” and overrode the original, basic file of “NT001010 activated”. Yangyang blinked when he woke up the morning after, fully charged, and Renjun’s sweet voice sounded in his mind. The door cracked open and Renjun popped his head in with a bright smile.

“Rise and shine, sleepyhead. I made pancakes so the morning fuel is pancakes flavoured!”

It turned out that fuel from the Neo-Vision Technology Pte. Ltd. can be customized to taste like human food. Renjun was elated when he had first found out about it in a brochure that they sent to him. He immediately ordered a whole random box of samples — there were steak, pancakes and even chocolate mint ice cream flavour. Yangyang was thankful that Renjun was willing to splurge money on him and he gratefully consumed the fluids.

Yangyang enjoyed his new home and he enjoyed Renjun’s company even more. He had no qualms about the new environment and Renjun had been an absolute dear to him. If there was one thing, one speck of dirt, in this new life he was leading, it was Donghyuck.

He absolutely hated the house and how Renjun acted whenever Donghyuck returned from his flights.

He hated how Renjun would forget his presence whenever Donghyuck returned. He hated how Renjun’s face lit up when Donghyuck’s keys jiggled at the door and the room seemed to brighten up whenever he stepped across the threshold. He hated how Renjun gazed at him with so much love and adoration. He hated how they would always spend minutes and hours kissing like they had been separated for years. He hated how Donghyuck could coax all kinds of noises from Renjun whenever he pinned him down on various surfaces and in various positions.

On days, or nights, when Donghyuck was home, Yangyang was thankful for the wine flavoured fuel that Renjun had purchased. He was glad to be drunk and knocked out before he could see or _hear_ them through the night. Renjun was loud and Donghyuck even louder and their sounds were like torture to Yangyang. He wished to be the one who got to pin Renjun down on the couch, peppering a trail of kisses down the pale, white column of his neck, slowly coaxing the low moans from the man. But alas, he was right here in his charging spot, willing himself to shut down for the night.

And yet, he could never. Not when Renjun made such sinful sounds in the bedroom beside his.

———————

As the days in the Huang household go by, Yangyang picked up a few things about Renjun and his partner, Donghyuck.

  1. Purchasing Yangyang was Donghyuck’s idea so there was someone to accompany Renjun while he left for work
  2. They are very, disgustingly, ridiculously, in love
  3. The ongoing joke of “Renjun who lights up the world” may in fact be true because he truly did light up Yangyang’s world.



Donghyuck was away for another long haul flight. He had left earlier that morning with a promise to buy Renjun those little, delicate macarons Renjun loved from Paris. Renjun had pressed slow, languid kisses on his lips, hands curled around his collar, as Donghyuck held him by the waist. They would always spend minutes kissing before Donghyuck left for work and Renjun would spend the day sulking at the lack of Donghyuck-ness in the house. Donghyuck pulled him close, nuzzling his neck, as Renjun murmured against the shell of his ears, the same sentence he repeated whenever Donghyuck left for a flight.

“Be safe, I’m waiting for you right here.”

It’s a promise. It’s a prayer. It’s a token of affection, adoration and love.

This time, however, Renjun didn’t sulk the entire day off. They had been up for hours, Donghyuck’s flight was at 6 am hence Renjun had been up since 3am to make him breakfast and to send him off. It’s around 10 am, a good six hours since Donghyuck had left, and Renjun had been exceptionally productive. He had already finished editing the articles sent to him overnight, had written a few pieces of his own, truly the most productive Yangyang had seen him be — and was already done for the day and it hadn’t even been 11 am yet — that was, if the writers at the fashion magazine did their jobs well and Renjun didn't have to edit their reworked articles again.

But for now, Renjun busied himself with preparing lunch. There was leftover ribeye steak from one of their date nights three nights ago, and it was on its way to getting spoilt in the fridge. Renjun tuned into a playlist and crooned out songs as he sliced the mushrooms for the sauce and blanched up some vegetables to go with the steak. Yangyang was lurking around the kitchen, watching Renjun cook as he fluttered between the stove, cutting board and fridge, as the delicious aroma wafted into Yangyang’s nose.

Yangyang stared at the hips that sashayed to the beat of the music as Renjun hummed while he tossed the vegetables into the pan. The steak was sizzling in the cast iron pan as Renjun piled the sauteed vegetables on an empty plate. He swallowed thickly and averted his eyes, chiding himself for the ridiculous thoughts that plagued his mind. He turned his eyes back on the bottle of fuel he had taken out of the cupboard, pouring himself a generous glass of it, as the song on the radio changed to something more ballad-ish. Renjun had taken upon himself to belt out the notes with the spatula as a fake microphone, twirling in the kitchen.

It was little things, quirks, that Renjun displayed which endeared himself to Yangyang.

Yangyang gulped down a glass of fuel as his parts clanged loudly within himself, and Yangyang prayed that Renjun didn’t hear it. His worries were redundant because when he turned his gaze back on Renjun, the man was standing frozen by the stove, his steak burning in the cast iron pan. Yangyang was about to call out his name when the phone rang and the spatula slipped from Renjun’s hands, clattering loudly on the floor. Renjun turned to stare at the offensive device as the screen flashed that there was an incoming call. He sorted himself out, and with shaky fingers, Renjun tried to connect the call.

He whined in frustration when he stumbled to pick it up, his hands shaking profusely, as he fumbled to connect the call. He let out a frustrated noise of despair before forgoing the attempt to hold on to the phone and just swiped harshly to connect the call. He set it on loudspeaker, not trusting himself not to drop the phone, and a low whimper escaped his lips. There was a dreaded cloud of unease that spread across his chest, sticky like honey but bitter like lotus seeds. It loomed over Renjun as he croaked a light greeting.

“Hello, this is Huang Renjun speaking.”

There was silence on the line and then the dam broke.

_Greetings, Mr Huang. I’m Alicia from Neo Airlines. I’m sorry to inform you the Flight NA230, that Mr Lee Donghyuck was piloting, had met with an unforeseen circumstance. Mr Lee was forced to do an emergency landing in the pacific ocean but the engine had caught on fire. There was an explosion before he cou— Mr Huang? Are you still on the line? Mr Hu—_

Yangyang watched the phone beeped once before the screen faded to black as Renjun sank to the floor. His legs were trembling and weakened as he tried to understand what he had just heard. Plane Crash? The plane that _his_ Donghyuck was on had crashed? It can’t be. It’s impossible. He blinked at the sudden silence in the house, static sounds flooding his senses and all he could hear was white noise. Renjun scrambled for the phone, breaking himself out of the stupor, but the screen remained blank. Renjun’s phone battery had run flat. He sat on the floor numbly, as he cradled the phone close to his heart, tears welling up in his eyes.

The first anguish wail resonated across the empty house. Then, the second one followed. Then comes the third. And fourth. And fifth.

Renjun sobbed and thrashed on the floor, wailing, snarling, whimpering, as he clung on to his phone against his heart. The anguished cries and heart-wrenching sobs were broken when the house phone rang, shrill and loud, as Renjun lapsed into a stunned hiccup. He turned to Yangyang and nodded weakly from his position on the ground. Yangyang made his way to the house phone, blinking at the shrill machine as he turned to Renjun who was staring at him with bloodshot eyes.

“Make it stop, please Yangyang, make it stop,” Renjun wailed, fingers clawing the floor, scraping at whatever he could.

Yangyang spared the sobbing man a more look before he picked up the call. It was Jeno and Jaemin. They were best friends with Renjun and Donghyuck and the two of them wouldn’t have met if it wasn’t for them. Yangyang had met them twice when they came up to accompany Renjun whenever Donghyuck had a period of terrible flight schedule. He spoke to them quietly and asked if they could hurry over to help Renjun. They knew of the plane crash, the Airlines had contacted them after they lost connection with Renjun, and they were on their way to the house.

The call disconnected with Yangyang promising them to take care of Renjun until they arrived. He lowered the receiver gingerly and his operating system had already pulled up the plans in helping a crying human. He turned back and gasped loudly when he saw the state Renjun was in. His fingers were matted with blood and broken fingernails as he scratched again the cold, hard floor. The pristine black and white marbled flooring had trails and specks of blood on it. Yangyang knelt before Renjun and gently curled his hands around Renjun’s wrist, allowing the other to scratch his arms up.

“Renjun, I need you to stop hurting yourself,” Yangyang said calmly, eyes shifting to a dull shade of blue, as he gripped on to the fragile wrists of Renjun.

“I can’t, it hurts, Yangyang. It feels like my heart is being ripped out,” Renjun sobbed, wheezing mutely as he whimpered against the cold marble floor.

Snot and blood messed together into a murky, pinkish mess of fluids smeared on the clean flooring. Renjun laid his cheek on the cold floor, eyes were voided of emotion other than grief. The beautiful pair of eyes that had always regarded Yangyang kindly was lifeless and Renjun looked like a puppet. He thrashed around in Yangyang’s hold, wailing for him to let him go, before Yangyang cradled him in his arms. He tightened his fingers around the petite waist and held him down until Jeno and Jaemin had arrived. The manual had reminded him that humans, when in a state of distress or pain, liked to be held gently.

And so he did.

*****

Two days later, they found Donghyuck’s body in the ocean.

If Yangyang hadn’t believed that people could shatter into a million pieces from the emotions they felt, now he did. He remembered the empty, soulless look in Renjun’s eyes — the pair of beautiful brown eyes that held the brightest spark once, now reduced to nothing but a shell of what they used to be. He remembered how Jeno had slumped against the couch as Jaemin sat dumbly, staring into nothing. Yangyang had navigated around them cautiously as he poured out water into plastic cups, urging them to drink.

Then came the funeral of their loved one.

It was a gloomy Saturday when they buried Donghyuck, six and a half feet under the soil, and Renjun collapsed after the service into the waiting arms of Jeno and Jaemin. Jaemin had tears streaked over his face as he held on to Renjun like he was a fragile glass ornament, while Jeno encased them in his arms. Yangyang stood in the distance as the sky rumbled and roared above them. Rain cascaded upon them without suddenly and Yangyang quickly fetched an umbrella before hurrying over to them. He raised it above Renjun’s head and gave Jeno and Jaemin the other one. Jeno gave him a light bob of his head to thank him as he sheltered Jaemin and himself.

Jaemin whispered gently to Renjun to take care of himself and to “give us a call if you need anything, regardless how small or large it is” before he left a wet kiss on Renjun’s cold, drenched cheek. Renjun gave him a brief nod, keeping his silence as he shivered in the rain. Jaemin held back a sob as he gave the tombstone one last touch before he turned away from his best friend resting several feet under. Jeno gave the motionless Renjun a light squeeze on the arm before giving Yangyang an awkward pat on the arm as they made their way out of the cemetery.

Renjun stood in the rain in silence, his little fist quivering in the cold and as he stared at the tombstone forlornly. As the rain poured down from up above, Renjun sank to his knees, disregarding the mud that clung to his suit, as he rested his cold cheek to the cold, wet tombstone. His cries slashed through the empty cemetery, every howl rivalled the winds, every snarl was more anguished than a trapped beast, every whimper clenched at the very mechanical heart in Yangyang's core. He shivered in the cold, quivered with emotions as he clung onto the tombstone, sight blurred with tears.

Yangyang stood there in silence, beside Renjun, as he watched the petite boy he had grown to love shred himself into a million pieces. He stood in silence. He watched the emotions crash out of Renjun like a herd of bulls that had seen red, like the rivers when the monsoon season arrived. Yangyang shook his head at the thought of how Renjun looked like he had lost half of soul and had buried it along with Donghyuck. He stood mutely behind Renjun, sheltering Renjun from the weather. There was only one thought remaining in his mind.

_How powerful Lee Donghyuck was to evoke such sadness and grief within Renjun._

———————

“Sicheng, do whatever it takes to revive him.”

Sicheng kept his silence, hands warm on Kun’s back. “If I do that, he may not be the Yangyang you’ve created.”

Kun lowered his head, tears welled up in his eyes, his hands clenched into fists before he gave Sicheng a shaky nod. Sicheng squeezed his shoulders lightly before stepping away and connected the wires on Yangyang. The android thrashed on the table, hands clawing the air until Sicheng overrode his actions with the master key. The last sound he made was a low whimper before he went motionless on the table.

 _Please, don’t take him away from me_.

There was soft whirling of mechanics and a low hum of the drill removing the screws from Yangyang’s head. There was a crackle in the air as Sicheng gently detached the wires from the motherboard in the head compartment. Kun was quietly sobbing at the side, refusing to look at the motionless android before him.

 _Please, I have already lost him once_. _Don’t take the last thing he left for me away_.

Sicheng gently tugged the motherboard away from the casing in Yangyang’s head as a bead of oil fell from his eyes. The processing unit, in the form of a memory chip, was eased out of the slot. Yangyang watched in silence as they replaced his memories, replaced his processing system to a new one, helplessly. He knew why they had to do it but the dull ache in his mechanical heart throbbed painfully as Sicheng inserted a brand new memory chip and motherboard. He felt the searing heat as Sicheng sealed him up and repaired the broken parts deftly.

Yangyang shut his eyes, his heartbeat slowing down, his limbs and legs motionless, as Sicheng gradually forced the central system to slowly shut him down.

———————

Renjun lived like a ghost after the funeral.

Yangyang had long heard of the Soulmate theory in the human world, Donghyuck had always called Renjun that when he was alive. Turned out he wasn’t actually lying about it because it seemed that Donghyuck had taken half of Renjun’s soul when he died. The soul he took from Renjun remained neatly trapped in the casket, under piles of soil and a couple of feets under.

If Renjun was already pale and fragile prior to Donghyuck’s death, he was even paler, almost translucent under the sunlight now. Yangyang didn’t know what to do as he watched Jeno and Jaemin move into the large house with their samoyed puppy called Jisung. Yangyang watched him sink deeper into the darkness, eyes only lighting up slightly when Jisung rested his head on his lap. Jeno and Jaemin were patient, very patient in fact, when they coaxed him to eat, take a shower and to function normally.

“Baby steps, Renjun. No one is forcing you to be well overnight,” Jaemin comforted after Renjun broke yet another porcelain cup in frustration. “Just do the next thing right, darling. Take a step, and another step again, you’ll be fine.”

Yangyang looked away when he met Renjun’s sorrowful eyes as he swept the broken piece of porcelain away. Jeno gave him a grateful smile which he didn't reciprocate as he retreated into his room. He could hear the low mumbling from Jaemin as, without a doubt, they cuddled Renjun through the day, each dealing with their pain differently. Yangyang saw through the strong facade Jeno puts on, having to muster enough strength for both Jaemin and Renjun. Yangyang deciphered that the words that Jaemin tells Renjun were probably more for himself than the other.

Yangyang saw past the tears and anger of Renjun to recognise a broken boy, trying to glue back the broken pieces of himself. He saw the cracks in the anger, he watched the futile attempts at being strong, he guarded over the tears that poured out as Renjun slowly drowned in them. He stood in silence, as he did during the funeral, and watched the three broken humans seek comfort and warmth within each other’s arms as they mourned and grieved over their lost friend and love.

For once, after arriving in the happy household of Huang Renjun and Lee Donghyuck, Yangyang tore his eyes away from the group on the couch and returned to his room quietly. No one noticed him leaving, no one looked for him. The entire house was filled with dread, grief and cries.

 _I could never fit into that circle of theirs_.

*****

The day Renjun left the world, Yangyang was tasked to head over to town to grab fried rice from that Chinese takeout that Renjun was craving.

Renjun had turned for the better as days went by, Jeno and Jaemin slowly returned to their lives, only checking up on Renjun hourly. Yangyang had taken upon himself to learn how to cook — Renjun had sworn off from cooking — and kept the house clean and tidy. Renjun was still living like a shell, but he had adopted a ragdoll cat called Moomin and had spent hours together playing with him tirelessly. Yangyang was glad that a feline was able to bring a tiny spark of life back in the beautiful brown eyes.

It was a normal morning that day, Yangyang hummed under his breath as he swept the floor clean. Moomin was resting in Renjun’s embrace, mewling softly, as Renjun patted him absentmindedly. Yangyang was about to cook lunch when Renjun quipped from his place and asked if he could help to run an errand. Yangyang had adapted into handling simple errands like buying groceries and purchasing takeout meals whenever Renjun needed him to. Yangyang nodded eagerly and awaited for further instructions from Renjun.

“Do you mind heading into town, and there is a Chinese takeout store that I loved. I missed their fried rice, would you buy that for me?” Renjun asked carefully, eyes guarded as he watched Yangyang’s expression.

Yangyang nodded, eager to please, and immediately went to change out of his clothes. He returned with a coat and Renjun passed Moomin to him, eyes tender and soft, almost longing, as he stroked the soft fur of the feline. Yangyang took the cat bag carefully, carrying it on his shoulders, as Moomin yowled in the bag, looking at Renjun forlornly. Renjun cooed at Moomin softly, rubbing her soft fur as he dropped a kiss on his head. He shut the glass door tightly and gave Yangyang a tight-lipped smile.

“Walk Moomin while you’re at it then,” Renjun mused and Yangyang nodded.

“I’ll be back soon,” he promised and Renjun only nodded at his words.

Renjun gave Moomin one last scratch on his head as he stepped away and watched Yangyang get into the car. He waved at them as the car eased out of the driveway and sped off towards the city. The light in Renjun’s eyes dimmed as he murmured, “Drive carefully, keep Moomin and yourself safe”. Unbeknownst to Yangyang, that would be the last thing a living Renjun had said to him. Perhaps several hours later, he would blame himself for not seeing the signs fast enough, not understanding the human way and language and non-verbal cues enough. But for now, Yangyang was oblivious to the devastation that had slowly and surely crept upon them.

When he returned from the errand, Moomin growing relentless every growing second he was away, Jaemin was wailing on the porch, slumped over the pristine white steps. Jeno held him in his arms and they both looked up when Yangyang approached the house with caution. Jaemin leapt up from Jeno’s embrace and tore the cat bag away from Yangyang, cuddling Moomin to himself immediately as he retreated back to the corner of the porch. Jeno ruffled Jaemin’s hair softly, as he left the curled up man to walk towards Yangyang.

His eyes were sad and Yangyang could see the tremor that rolled off him, his hands shaking when he gave Yangyang a lookover. Yangyang watched his Adam's apple bobbed up and down, like a fish bait in the water, as Jeno swallowed once before he cleared his throat. Jeno was struggling to form words, willing himself to be strong, for both Jaemin and himself but Yangyang saw the cracks before he heard them.

Jeno sniffled once, twice, before a tear rolled down his cheek. He rubbed it away forcefully and turned his sight away from the ground to the police-infested house behind him. His chest expanded when he took another breath, willing his hands to cease the shaking, as he turned to Yangyang, sorrow filling the kind eyes he had always worn.

“Renjun’s dead,” informed Jeno, tone shaky and ladened with emotions. Yangyang swallowed an invisible lump in his throat, his hands clenching beside his hips. “He didn’t reply to our hourly texts so we came down to find him. He was soaking in bloodied water, far too pale and lifeless to be rescued. He was pronounced dead on the spot.”

Yangyang stood there unwavering and Jeno spared him a look, eyes flashing a momentary worry as he waved a hand before Yangyang’s eyes. Yangyang blinked at the motion and turned to Jeno stiffly, blinking. His brain had sputtered into a stop, his system going into overdrive, as his mind replayed the last few words. It’s almost insane that just two, or was it three, months ago, he had heard the exact same words spill out of the Airlines Public Relations lady when she intruded their house to deliver the news.

_He was pronounced dead on the spot._

Jeno dipped his head, tears flooded his eyes, as he sniffled and turned to face Jaemin who was still curled up with Moomin in his arms. Yangyang looked back at the house and turned his gaze back on Jeno who was brawling his heart out, muffling his noises in his elbows. He coughed and forced his words out between tears. “They found a suicide note, he had gone to find Donghyuck. Idiot, Donghyuck would be so angry at him for throwing his life away for him,” Jeno tried to smile which really just came out as a grimace. “They’re happily reunited now, I’m sure of it.”

Yangyang nodded numbly, his brain had failed in rebooting after it had sputtered to a stop, the low hum of his system faded into white noise. Jeno yelped softly when he saw the two newcomers over Yangyang’s shoulder, wiping his tears away from his blotchy face. He excused himself from Yangyang and quickly approached them, sniffling as he greeted them. Yangyang turned to see who had arrived and his eyes dimmed a little when he saw that it was Kun and Sicheng.

It was no surprise why and who they had come for and the way Jeno had bowed at them, Yangyang received his answer. They were speaking to the other man in hushed tones but the quick glances that Kun had stolen at Yangyang gave it away. Jeno was apologising again, Yangyang was sure of it, his body language told him everything he needed to know. He didn’t bat an eyelash when Jeno gave him another soft pat and returned to where Jaemin had visibly calmed down on the porch. He didn’t bat an eyelash when Kun stood beside him, and he just gazed at the house he had called home for several months.

They stood in silence, giving him a little time to send his farewell, and Yangyang dipped his head in submission. He could feel the curious gazes of Jeno and Jaemin from the porch but he closed his eyes and pulled up the image of Renjun smiling in the sunlight. Sicheng exchanged a look with Kun as he rested a warm hand against the power button on his lower back. Yangyang screwed his eyes shut as his system shut down completely. The last he heard was the anguished mewl from Moomin before everything faded to black.

———————

Yangyang woke up to a whirl of mechanics and Kun’s soft voice speaking to another person who he couldn’t quite make out. He heard low murmurs of a conversation he couldn’t quite follow — “We need new parts for the damaged retina display,” a pause before a low frustrated groan of “we have already changed his motherboard, Sicheng! Why isn’t he waking up?”. Yangyang blinked and groaned painfully as his unoiled joints crackled under the movement, successfully alerting both Kun and Sicheng of his presence. It’s Sicheng’s face that Yangyang sees first as he groans and there was a soothing warm hand on his head. He hummed lightly as his system tried to gather more information about his whereabouts.

“Hello, I’m Kun and your name is Yangyang. Can you hear me?” Kun spoke to him, voice and articulation clear in the quiet laboratory.

Yangyang nodded at his words, eyes shifting to Sicheng who quickly introduced himself to Yangyang. Yangyang tilted his head mechanically, raising his hand stiffly before he turned back to Kun. The older scientist ran a soothing finger down his arm and sighed in relief that everything was alright and normal with him. Kun turned his back towards Yangyang and spoke to Sicheng who nodded and ran another round of diagnosis on Yangyang. Once the system reflected that it was a brand new, ultra-clean slate, they were relieved.

It has been almost a fortnight since the day Yangyang returned to the laboratory with them. He had inflicted every possible damage there was to his body and memory, only to evoke a shutdown of the system and to hear Renjun’s voice again. It hurt Kun to watch him ruin himself like this — smashing his retina out, ruining the synthetic skin at the tips of his fingers, slamming his head against anything sharp to dull the pain he felt. It broke him more than he could muster in words when he had to change the entire system in Yangyang; but if it is what kept him safe, he was willing to make that choice again and again.

Kun gave Yangyang another gentle smile before he switched the operating system off, and watched Yangyang enter nap mode. Sicheng gave him a tentative smile and allowed himself to be pulled out of the laboratory by Kun. Yangyang had stabilised after a change in the microchip and motherboard, much to Sicheng’s relief. He knew how special the android was for Kun, and he knew it hurt Kun as much as it did, no even more than it did, for him. They just wanted Yangyang to be alright and well.

As their retreating backs disappeared around the corner, the laboratory resumed its silence, except for the occasional hum of machines. Yangyang reached into the system and carefully deactivated the nap mode before chuckling to himself. He powered on his system remotely and closed his eyes as a sweet, soothing voice flooded his mind. He choked back an impending sob, feeling the oil prick at his newly fixed retina display, blurring his sight.

 _Good morning, Yangyang_. A static pause. _Rise and shine, sleepyhead_.

He managed to save the last bit of his heart, and he would keep it safely hidden.

**Author's Note:**

> android-system check; return code 10100: There was a system error that occurred. This caused an upgrade failure. Please investigate the error. 
> 
> android-system check; return code 323: An unexpected error occurred. Reboot request denied. Please try again later.


End file.
